A YEAR OF BEING MARRIED

6:29 AM


So a year back this phenomena happened to me on 14th May and yes, it's no big a deal (Read here: Engagement, Haldi, Marriage, Reception). Marriage has been good mostly, and we didn't even realize how a year just passed by. Some warned us that the first year is the toughest and you can wade through it then it's all cool, and some said the first year always goes by like a breeze, the challenge is post the year mark. 

You know what, I don't care. Marriage is a different ball game, and nothing can ever prepare you for it. You can't exactly explain marriage to a person by giving a certain scenario or examples. It's different for different people. There are all kinds of marriages and it's about finding your own kind and living in it fully.

Our marriage has been a learning experience. We constantly learn from each other. My husband is the most patient and calm person I have ever met in my life and that has made me calmer, precisely by 10% as of now :P. He has learned to speak his mind from me, as he loves this trait about me and guess what, it's all cool. 
We are two different people and yet so similar in many things and I guess that is how it is with most couples. Life would be boring if two people are alike and the differences are what makes it perfect in a way. 

He's not a music lover while I am a music buff, but now he ensures he puts on some music every weekend to set the mood and to make me happy. We both love watching movies and that is what we do together. We don't force things upon each other (except for me wanting him to like fish, he likes basa so far..) as it doesn't make sense to either of us.

I recently read an article where the wife takes holidays all alone every once in a while as she feels it is the only time she can do what she loves the most. And, the best part was that her husband is more than happy to let her have this time away in spite of everyone in the family opposing it. I was really inspired by this story. It's interesting to know marriages have evolved for good and that is the kind of marriage I want to have with my husband where we give each other space, understand our individual passions and be friends first.

It's important to have some ground rules when you marry. When we got married we were clear that we would never speak with raised voices, never hide from each other and that we would always speak our mind, however hurtful or uncomfortable it is, and this works beautifully for us. We never let our fights linger for more than 30mins, just hug it out and forget about it like buddies.  

It's been a year now and I can say confidently, we did great. We both still can't believe it's been a year already and like my husband says, it's excellent to have a friend by your side at all times.

I am not going to recommend marriage, talk highly about it or patronize people to marry. Marry at your own will and to the person, you wish to spend each and every day of the rest of your life. If you can handle it then go ahead, get married.

This post is dedicated to all the lovely married couples who are living their own kinda marriage.



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